Your "About Me" is as exciting as a sock and this is why...

(This is a bit out of order because your About Me is the second hurdle after your pictures. However, the pictures “how to” is much more involved, so I’ll post that later.) 

Let’s start by saying, we get it, you are looking for a partner in crime and you like the outdoors. I will say this time and time again, your single biggest obstacle in this dating app game is blending in. You really don't need to tell me that you like to laugh. 

You have a few short lines to sell yourself to us.

Whether or not you agree with that statement, or like it, it’s the truth. You are selling us on the idea that you are worth our time and attention. Let me use a weird analogy about socks to demonstrate:

A woman (the one you are trying to date/sleep with/marry) is looking to buy a pair of socks (you). She goes online (dating app world) to look for socks. There are 30,000 to choose from. She clicks on a picture of socks that look fine and the description says “Cotton socks. Great for feet. Good for walking, keeping feet warm and dry, and fit in shoes while on the feet.” Why in the world would we choose that sock over the 29,999 other pairs of socks? We wouldn’t! So every time you say “I like to laugh and I’m looking for a decent girl to spend time with.” We are reading “Cotton socks. Great for feet.” Of course you like to laugh and clearly you are looking for a girl to spend time with. You are a human and you are on a dating site, no need to state the obvious. 

Here are some examples of sock descriptions:


So, what are you supposed to do then?!? 

1. Be. You. Neek. (and “speaking” entirely in emojis is NOT unique)

What makes you different than all the other socks? Tell us one interesting fact about yourself - sometimes just this is enough (along with your height - don’t roll your eyes I’ll explain this in a second).

Example 1: “When I was in 6th grade I was suspended for 2 weeks because I brought 8 salamanders to school and traded them for every cookie and bag of chips my class had to offer. 5’11” “ Why does this work? Because it’s memorable, funny, and it gives me something to talk to you about without having to think and most importantly it’s interesting enough to make me want to know more about you!  
Example 2: “Up until 2 years ago I thought the lyric to Dancing Queen by ABBA was ‘Dancing queen, feel the beat from the tangerine!’ and I never questioned it. 6’1” “ 


2. A short, useful list of important information (optional). 

If there are important facts about you that you feel we need to know up front, please share. Such as: you’re religious and you want someone else who is as well. You have children. You are looking for a NSA relationship. You have 6 cats and they are very very important to you. You are a professional video game player and are looking for the same. etc. etc.  You don’t have to tell us everything, that’s what a conversation over coffee/beer is for!!! 

Example 1: “Engineer. Avid climber - it would be great if you were as well. Sober. Fiercely liberal. Seeking more than casual.” 
Example 2: “Faith. INTP. I don’t own a TV.” 


To go back to the sock analogy, if there are things about you that make you VERY different from all the other socks. Put it out there. No need to waste anyone’s time if they aren’t what you are looking for or you aren’t what they’re looking for. For example: I, Katie, am 6’0” tall. When I’m actually on these apps to find a date I always state my height. I am knee high socks. Not everyone is interested in buying knee high socks. I know this. I’m okay with this. I don’t want to waste anyone’s time. 


3. Your height. Feet. Inches. That's all. 

Yes your height matters and no you don’t have to say “because I guess it matters.” after you list your height. Just put it as the last thing on your about me. Just the actual numbers. Very simple. I’m sorry that this is important, I really am, but you’re going to have to trust me on this. This will avoid the uncomfortable “So, I’m sorry to ask you, but am I taller than you?” question while texting or any uncomfortable unmet expectations if you make it to a date. Oh and don’t say shit like “taller than you. you can wear your heels.” It’s 2017, your height has nothing to do with what footwear we choose also when I wear heels I’m 6’3”. Don’t assume anything. 


So, the recipe for your new about me:


  • One fun/interesting/memorable quip or fact about you. 
  • Short list (3-5) of useful information (optional). 
  • Height


Two Thumbs Up: 



  • State your dislikes. Remember that you are selling us on you. It comes off as negative and you’re going to miss out on some great girls because I don’t know a single woman that says “looking for: negative and judgmental” 
  • Tell us you are a sock. Further examples: I like to have fun but also to relax. I love my friends and family. I like music. I like sports. I go to the gym. I AM A SOCK. 
Katie Bessert